Self-Care Is Self-Love: People-Pleasing Is Neither

Sometimes, like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz, , we have exactly what we need and don’t see it or choose to overlook it. People pleasing doesn’t prove anything other than questions our sanity.

When we do so much for others, and less for ourselves, we have lost some self-respect, and therefore, are not practicing self-care. When people ask you to do something against your ethical and moral barometer, then respect for themselves has been tainted.

Early on, I learned that no matter what I do, I cannot force someone to love me. When the secret was out about the abuse, one of the male family members lied about his involvement. Then, I knew that love is not built on pleasing others. Therefore, I wanted someone who would love me for me, and not what I can do for him. I learned that I must love myself first, because people will often treat you how you treat yourself.

Learn more about my memoir, Bent Not Broken, which shares how I used my sexual abuse experience to formulate healthy life principles and additional healthy living tips by signing up below for my quarterly newsletter. Be bent on the idea that adversity will make you stronger.

Everyday is a day to remake yourself into the person you want to be and not how others unleashed their pain on you.

Make this lifetime great!

Timika

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Does It Really Matter Who or What Reveals The Truth To You?

When I find myself in a situation that I don’t want to be in, I ask how did I get here? The answer is a series of choices and events.

Even in my child abuse experience, there was much to learn about myself and life, not in an attacking way, but how to live more consciously.

I do not wish for anyone to experience abuse. When there is nothing to revert the situation, what do you do? You learn. You heal and move forward.

Timika

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Power

Even now, my mother tells me that “you are the adult. They are your children.”

Evolution serves a purpose. The more we understand that people have a right to live their life unopposed by others, the less we try to control others.

The Word of God informs us that God gave us dominion” over fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and over the cattle and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth” (Genesis 1:26)

No where in my energy space do I understand our role is to dehumanize, humiliate, or force others to do something outside of their ethical realm. People are not hear to soothe egos, but to remind us of the Truth.

Real power is believing there is enough. There is no need to kill, take, and destroy, but to understand that we will have what we need when we need it.

Make this lifetime great!

Timika

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