With $4000, two suitcases, and three children under the age of 5, our mother left our father. As a child, I remember wondering if life would have been better if our father had effectively addressed his issues. It did not take long for me to dismiss this thought because my father was addicted to alcohol. For approximately, four and a half years, he emotionally and physically abused our mother.
I know that God carried my family through some storms. By the grace of God, we have never gone without our basic needs being met. One of the things I am very grateful for is that my mother’s teachings of life principles were unopposed by my father-something she experienced in the five years she was with him.
In my 30’s I joined a fatherless daughter group because I wanted to help those who grew up without a father, but left the group after several months. One of the reasons I left the group was because I realized that I did have a father. God was there when my biological father could not be. I did not want to focus on what I did not have, but what I did have.
No longer do I hold anger towards my father. I feel compassion towards him now. He missed out on seeing three wonderful children grow up, and unfortunately, his absence continues in the lives of his grandchildren.
The one major lesson I learned from growing up without my biological father is the importance of addressing my hurts so that love does not have to hurt the next generation. I appreciate the courage and strength of those who are answering the call of parenthood, particularly mothers.
May God Bless You and Your Children!