How Can You Have Restful Sleep Despite Your Circumstances

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Sleep is the most fundamental action we can take to achieve mental awareness and balance. When we make restful rejuvenation a priority (superseding our emotions and feelings), we can better deal with life issues.

I didn’t realize individuals who experience childhood sexual abuse were at an increased risk of developing post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), having trouble sleeping, or having nightmares until I was in my mid-20’s. What I knew was I loved gazing at the dark-lit sky and hearing the symphony produced by the nighttime creatures. I loved sleep, and sleep loved me. I could fall asleep anywhere and at any time.

My mother helped with setting the foundation of quality sleep. She didn’t make us take naps, and we were in bed most nights by 9 pm. And my mother was an early riser. On occasions when I would wake up to go to the bathroom, she was sound asleep in her bed. In addition, my mother would say things like:

  1. “take control of your dreams.
  2. “You are in control.”
  3. “Children need their sleep.”
  4. “Let the past be the past.”
  5. “Nip things in the bud and “don’t start nothing, won’t be nothing.”

During my 20’s and early 30’s, I kept my regular sleep habits and often had trouble staying up past 9 pm unless I was on a date. Thanks to my alignment with my circadian rhythm, I could never read or study all night during my undergraduate and graduate studies. While living in my Saint Louis apartment, I would set my alarm to 1 or 2 a.m. to watch the 4 pm Oprah show I missed, and even then, I couldn’t stay up. 

As you know, our circadian rhythm is our internal process that regulates the sleep/wake cycle. This alignment with nature is something we all have until we believe something can affect how our body is naturally wired. Unfortunately, over the past two years, I forgot about this alignment. 

  1. I took things personally (a big cause of interrupted sleep).
  2. I stressed out about things I couldn’t control and didn’t trust God. 
  3. I forgot the answers to life’s issues often come in the morning after a good night’s rest.
  4. I felt overwhelmed, unsupportive, unappreciated, and alone. In other words, I felt like a victim and attacked.
  5. I made things more than what they were. I saw problems and more problems. My imagination was getting the best of me.

Does anything above sound familiar to you?

I even thought about taking melatonin supplements, but I‘ve never been a big advocate about taking stuff my body already has. When I stopped doing the above things and others, I found my way back to peaceful rest. 

So, what helped to restore me to restful nighttime sleep? And what can help you?

  1. At one time, you didn’t have problems sleeping because of your natural built-in system. Your body releases relaxing chemicals such as melatonin and lowers other chemicals. Your body didn’t change. Your perception changed. When I changed my perception, I returned to restful sleep.
  2. Make restful sleep a priority. Everything else can wait in the morning or later. I incorporated some melatonin-producing foods for a few nights, but the more I slept, the more I wanted restful sleep.
  3. Everything you need, you will have. I remembered how all my needs are always met. So I continued to pray and meditate, retraining my mind to trust in God, nature, and myself to know the right thing to do. God did not change. I did. 
  4. You are not a victim but a student of life. I remembered my student approach to life and started speaking more positively to myself. Although my circumstances were not ideal and what I wanted, there were something to learn about myself. 

Make this lifetime great! You deserve it. Please share if you believe this post can help someone and subscribe to my quarterly empowering newsletters.

Timika 

How Can Chains Free You Instead of Imprison You?

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So have you ever done something that you regret? Of course, you have. That was a silly question on my part. Or was it? 

You can probably list several things you have done and wish you knew and did better or trusted yourself.

At one point during my nursing career, I worked for a local traveling agency. One day, the company sent me to a county clinic, and there I heard the words that further changed how I thought about life. I am unsure of everything I said to this Nurse Practitioner, but she must have sensed that I was complaining and feeling down. And without looking at me and further explaining herself, the Nurse Practitioner said, “they based their actions on what they knew.” Then, she walked away to take care of her client. She wasn’t mad at me. That’s how the truth is. The truth needs no explaining and only acceptance.

Her words sank in me. Our actions are based on what we know. I knew this principle because sometime after my sexual abuse experience, I wanted to be more conscious of life. I wanted to align with the Voice of Reason within me that knew all. I wanted to be free and live a life without excessive anger, fear, worrying, and others. Although I continued to struggle with some emotions, somewhere deep in me, I knew that excessive and lingering emotions were a waste of energy, money, and time. And life proved it to me.

This morning, my husband and I couldn’t help but notice the communication between several birds. I laid in bed for a few minutes, listening to the freedom I heard in their singing and speaking. Then, I remembered, “behold the fowls of the air: for they sow not, neither do they reap nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feedeth them” (Mathew 6:26).

During prayer time, I remembered how I didn’t think about getting this or that as a child. Things just fell into place. At an early age, I started saying, “I’ll do my best, and God will handle the rest. I would also say, “God can make things right.” So, I stopped worrying about many stuff, and many emotions, including forgiveness, slipped away. And I lived my life, and other life events continued to test my newfound ways of thinking.

Our children often remind me of our natural, free spirit and how learning about life does not always lead to anger and guilt. 

So, how do you use chains to enable freedom instead of bondage? 

Each day, you realize that:

  1. It’s better to surrender to life than it is to fight it. So many of our emotions and feels are based on the nonacceptance of what is. 
  2. Live in the moment, which is all there is. The past is gone, and the future takes care of itself. Nothing you do will change what has already happened.
  3. Do the best you can and move on. Work with what you have. So many times growing up, we didn’t have the right tools (hammer, screwdriver), but we got the job done. We have more to work within ourselves than we think.
  4. Learn and plan, but do not obsess about things. Somehow things work out for the best. What you thought you wanted or couldn’t live without was not true.

I am happy to be alive. Each day is an opportunity to enjoy life instead of stressing over how, why, when, where, and who. As the bible says, do not be conformed to this world, but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind (Romans 12:2). Therefore, we can transform our life by changing our thoughts to bring more joy, peace, and understanding that our experiences do not define us. We define ourselves. 

Make this lifetime great!

If you believe someone else could benefit from this post, please share. Also, you can subscribe to my empowering quarterly newsletters on health, purpose, and transformation.

Thanks for reading!

Timika

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See The Distractions For What They Are

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We interact with many people during our lifetime. Some walk alongside us, leading us to greater clarity, conviction, determination, and perseverance to achieve what we believe is possible. Some work with us, extending the vision that there is enough for all. All life has a divine purpose. We work together to make this world a better place. We hold unto the mustard seed of faith (KJV, Mathew 17:20), despite those who doubt us. We stand out from the crowd, avoiding “fitting in” because deep down inside, we know we already belong to something greater than the world. Our birth justifies our magnificence presence on this earth. We are not what others say about us or what they do to us. We are who we say we are. We are not our experiences, and we avoid labeling the moments in our lives that awaken us. Instead, we see our experiences as the catapults to unveil our true nature. 

We move forward despite what others say about us. We know that if they remembered who they are, they too would walk the path of greater resistance. We may experience a few blows and knockouts, but we rise again all because we know we can. We do not succumb to our emotions, feelings, and pain. Instead, we use them to direct our paths and help others find their way. We do not have to fit the mold, but stand as the co-Creator to create masterpieces. We know that our work is not in vain, for everything is used to awaken those asleep.

We are more than our experiences. Keep the faith, for all things are possible to him (and her) who believeth. (KJV, Mark 9:23)

As a student of life committed to living her purpose, I am not bitter about growing up without my father, experiencing childhood sexual abuse, or being raised by a single parent. I am better because: 

  1. I know what it feels like not to receive a parent’s guidance, love, and protection. So, I am here for my children, and they will know I love them. 
  2. I know what it’s like to be forced and manipulated to do something. So I encourage people to align with their moral compass instead of forcing them to do something. 
  3. I know that if my mother can raise three children off minimum wage, provide the necessities of life and more, and teach us life principles, I can, too.

If you like my post, please share it.

Timika

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