Faded: put those negative thoughts to rest


Faded are the old ways of thinking: Make the most of your life.

1. To no longer live life on someone else’s terms. We all have the right to follow our own dreams and passions.

2. To no longer occupy the day with just things to do. To press forward, we must intentionally plan the day with activities that are in alignment with your goals. Time does not stand still for us make up our minds to do something.

3. To no longer fear the word “no”. To ask questions and let the other person tell you no instead of not asking and wondering if the outcome would have been different if you had asked your question. There is always a way to get something done. Put your creative cap on, and you will find a way.

4. To no longer put yourself in relationships that do not support you. It’s not so much the number of relationships you have, it is more about the quality of your relationships. Do you feel replenished or drained after speaking with a “friend”? Does your “friend” find every chance to put you down and belittle your efforts to be better and do better? Does he or she always want to keep those not so positive memories fresh in your mind? “Remember when you did this and that…….”

5. To no longer deny your desire to further your education, own your business, or embrace and develop your special gifts and talents. Believe in yourself and have confidence that you were designed the way you are for a reason.

Your life story will educate, empower, and inspire others to heal within and to pursue their dreams. Give hope where there is despair, give directions where there is no road map, and give love where there is hate.

Be the positive transformation you would like to see in the world.


Filthy and my priorities


When others would tell me that their house was filthy because they have been so busy at work, I would wonder how could they function with a messy house, and then I remembered that everyone is not wired the same way. We all have our priorities. I have had some people to tell me that they function better with clutter. Again….we are wired differently,

I used to be obsessed with keeping a clean and organized house. It is frustrating to not be able to find something when I need it. Plus, cleaning up was and still is my release…my form of meditation. I equate a clean and organized house with a clear and focused mind. When everything else around me is in place, I feel in place. I used to allow myself to get distracted by clutter and would quickly stop what I was doing to go clean. This method was counterproductive…. There is more to life than just keeping a clean and organized home. Nowadays, I write more to help clear my mind instead of cleaning more.

Now, that I am a mother, organizing my time is a must. I do my best to avoid a filthy home; however, I am not as obsessed with keeping my home clean. Over the past year, I decided to not spend a great deal of my day cleaning up. So, there may be a few dirty dishes left in the sink overnight or toys left in the living room. I have learned to relax a bit when it comes to cleaning up; yet, I still have my limits. I am also better at organizing my time to make time for other things such as reading, writing etc. I have learned that I need balance in my life. Keeping a clean and organized home is still a priority, and so is enjoying my life and making time for loved ones and myself.

For procrastinators or students having problems focusing on a task, many educators, including myself, will encourage students to declutter their surroundings to help them focus better and complete their task. Typically, if your mind is on 20 different things, your actions will reflect your thoughts. If a student has one project on his or her desk, more than likely that’s what he or she will focus on. Decluttering is usually a good tip to help others focus and achieve their goals.


Hyperbole: Guilty!


It is interesting that hyperbole is the daily word for today. I have been questioning the worth of hyperboles. Are they necessary? If so, then why?

This past Thursday, I was just sharing with a student how sleep deprived I felt that I was. I admitted that the last time I had some good sleep was before my son was born. As I was sharing that I, too, suffered from a lack of sleep, I questioned why am I agreeing with the need to just sleep my life away? Why am I using the phrase “I could sleep for a long time” when it is not true? Even when I worked nights, years ago, as a staff nurse at a local hospital, I could only sleep for 1-2 hours when I got home. Yes, I was tired, but I did not want to go to sleep during the day. That’s what nights were for. As you probably figured out, I did not work nights for long. There is a time for everything, and my body works well with its “master clock.”

If given the chance today, would I want to sleep my life away? The answer was and still is no, of course. I have so many things I still want to do, and I keep adding activities/events to my bucket list. Honestly, I have been trying to be more mindful of my thoughts and what I say. If I do not mean something, then why say it? It is a waste of energy and a waste of words, yet, I am sure I have used the phrase many times before, especially between the years of 2011-now.

Why do we feel the need to add excessive value to how we feel? With my statement of being tired, acknowledging that I was tired is one thing and to exaggerate is another. Let’s take another hyperbole. “I am so hungry, I can eat a horse.” Can I really? So, why exaggerate? Am I asking for the other person’s permission to go to sleep or to eat? What is my intention for using a hyperbole? To illicit compassion? Money? Food? love? Is it necessary to have others to empathize with me to take me seriously, or did I need the student to feel like she is not alone?

Sometimes when we are going through an ordeal, we think that we are the only one going through something. I usually tell my students they are not alone and can usually share a life changing story without getting to personal. I have to remember that even being quiet and just listening may be what the other person needs at that time especially instead of saying something I know is not true. Does the other person need to know how hungry I am or how sleepy I am? Not necessarily. Constantly feeling the need that one should quantify or quality statements for others to relate does not sound like a healthy habit. I need to change my ways.

I have been aware of another phrase for a very long time and this phrase is “say what you mean and mean what you say.” So, as we constantly evolve, we find out that some of the things we do, the words we say may conflict with something else we believe it or want to believe in. I need to be more true to the phrase “say what you mean and mean what you say” and stop saying things that are not true.

The more one says something, the more one tends to believe it. There is a known link between our beliefs and our actions (self-fulfilling prophecy). Again, as in the example above, I do not need to believe I am so tired. If anything, I need to believe that I am energetic and high on life.

I am guilty of using some hyperboles, and I confess. I need to stop using hyperboles, and just say what I mean, and mean what I say.