Today, I planned a different blog until my heart spoke to me. Like many others across the world, when I heard of Kobe Bryant and his 13-year old girl dying in a helicopter, I searched for meaning. From what I gather, his 13-year-old girl committed to continuing his legacy, the love of basketball, and Kolbe loved his girls and wanted to link purpose and passion with sports for his girls and children around the world. Over the years, we have lost so many influential people, and there is nothing like a tragedy that brings life into a closer focus.
The question that circled in my mind yesterday was “What is life really about?” Although I was not a consistent fan of Kobe Bryant, occasionally, I watched some of the games he played and often sat in awe of such great talent. I learned a lot about Kobe Bryant yesterday and the positive things he was doing (fatherhood, helping others to live out their dreams through his studio, books, and others) and the dreams he had, even for his 13-year old daughter.
We may not understand what God does. Though, I believe that in all experiences, there lie meaning and purpose. The meaning we give to experiences is different for everyone. Many times God used great figures to get our attention. What is God trying to tell us?
I believe that, for me,
Align my actions and thoughts with God’s will and to help our children do the same.
Live in the present; therefore, when our daughter and son came charging in our room, multiple times during Kobe Bryant tributes, I took the time to address their needs.
I thanked God for life and the family he gave me.
I prayed for the world, including Kobe Bryant’s family and the others who were on the helicopter.
Nothing that we produced on earth goes with us.
We are all accountable for what we do with the gifts and talents that God gave us.
I believe that God hears our prayers, and I continue to pray for continued compassion, love, and peace for everything and everyone.
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Is it beneficial to continue the same familial behaviors “just because that is the way it has always been done.” “My mother, father, grandmother, aunt, uncle and everyone else did it this way, so I will, too.”
Are we carrying comfort, joy, love, peace into the next generations or anger, bitterness, disappointments, or hatred into next generations? Are we researching to see if there is a better strategy to getting something done? For example, I read online how many parents are using meditation to help their child confront negative behaviors and adapt more positive behaviors through self-reflection and inner wisdom instead of whipping their children.
Ultimately, are we becoming the best person we know how to be and helping our children to do the same?
What would your answer be to the below questions?
1. If you have been diagnosed with diabetes and had a family member to die because of diabetes complications, should you stop preventative behaviors (checking your blood sugar, eating healthy and in moderation, consistent physical activity) because you believe that you will die of the same complications, too. Why or why not?
Are you upset that your mother did not take better care of her health and left you at a young age that you vow to never have children?
2. If your parents whipped you with a switch until your skin split open and started bleeding, should you discipline your children the same way? Why or why not?
3. If your father stayed at a job until retirement, regretting that he never pursued what he was passionate about, should you do the same? Why or why not?
4. If you were raised by a single parent, and one of your parents was not there for you throughout your childhood, should you be the same way to your children? Why or why not?
5. If your mother never served home cooked meals, and you frequently visited drive thru or sit in restaurants, should you not learn how to cook for your family? Why or why not?
6. If your mother never graduated from high school, should you settle for dropping out of high school and never pursue a college degree, even though you want to be a nurse? Why or why not?
7. If you believe that you were not loved by your parents, and you had a dysfunctional household, should you withhold love from your children (no hugs, kisses, or compassion shown)?
8. If you believe that you raised yourself, should you set the same expectations for your child?
9. If you were locked in a room for two hours a day anytime you did something your parents did not like, should you do the same to your child?
We have the knowledge and the power to make better choices for ourselves and our family. We can always seek experts in the field (Diabetes educator, healthcare providers, dietitians, parenting coaches, online organizations/ support groups to make better life choices. If something bothered you or just did not feel right as a child, why continue the same behaviors? Our actions and inactions can have a direct or indirect influence on our children, schools, communities, and the world.
For example, angry children can become angry adults. Angry adults can become angry employees, employers, wives, husbands, policeman, firefighters, nurses, doctors, etc. If the anger is left unchecked, well, you know what can happen.
What we do behind closed doors, do not stay behind closed doors.