These Questions May Help You Change Your State of Mind

Continue reading “These Questions May Help You Change Your State of Mind”

How To Keep Fighting and Standing For What You Believe In

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One of my pet peeves is someone interfering with the dreams of another. We have the right to keep fighting for our dreams and standing for our beliefs. We have abilities, experiences, gifts, and talents within us that desire expression.

When I was a young girl, I learned about my father’s opposition to my mother’s dream to become a nurse. My mother told us that he always had something else to do instead of babysitting us so our mother could study.

At one point, he threw my mother’s books into the dumpster outside of our Memphis apartment. He even showed up at her job despite the manager’s request, and my mother lost her job.

After experiencing incestual sexual abuse, I was hungry to accomplish something in my life. I needed something to drive me in a different direction. But, I remember not just being angry about my father’s lack of support. I was angry that he felt he had the right to oppose another’s dreams. The same day I heard about my father’s counterattack is the day I said, “he may have stopped you, but he will not stop me.”

In my personal life, I have observed anger, bitterness, and resentment in people who have not accomplished their goals, which makes me more determined to accomplish my dreams and help others do the same.

As a student of life, I knew that information was vital to existence. It’s even more critical to deciphering what you know and need to know.

As a nurse, I continued to help others who felt left out of the information loop in caring for themselves. While working as a hospital educator and a nursing instructor, I built resource guides because I wanted to know as much as possible to help others achieve and sustain health.

I’ve helped people understand how their medications work, take their medications at the right time and right way, lose weight, feel more confident about managing their health, get off their medications, eat healthier, and spend more time doing the things they loved.

My mother taught me to give from the heart, and if we have something to give, give it. Information is not mine to retain. As educators, we want people to think for themselves, but sometimes people need you to make that first step for them. One of the best things I can do to show others I care is by giving them the information they need, including obtaining accurate, reliable, and timely resources.

Just because someone opposes you doesn’t mean you have to give up. I’ll never forget what one of my clients told me. She said, “my doctor told me I couldn’t do it, but I knew I could. And, I did it.” BG.

Whatever you have opposing you, please know there is always a way to get something done.

The first question to ask is……Do you believe you can do it? Then ask, what do you need to know?

Make this lifetime great!

Timika

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Call Me By My Name

I never liked labels. Early on, our mother taught us to call people by their names, a principle she learned through her personal experience with teasing and through someone she loved. 

During my mother’s childhood, people teased her about her “skinny legs.” She shared her disappointment with her father. Then, he shared his story of being teased about the size of his head. She never forgot what it felt like to be teased or her father’s lingering pain from childhood; therefore, she was passionate about reinforcing her principle to call people by their name.

When some family members described an out-of-town family member, they described her by saying she was “crazy.” When I met the family member, I realized that she was not crazy; she was misunderstood. But, I saw the impact of other’s opinions on her identity. I saw the pain in her eyes; there was more to the wounds she had.

When I graduated from nursing school, some people referred to me as a “nurse.” I didn’t like that label either. I just wanted to be Timika, a person that is more than her experience. Part of what helped me to move forward from childhood sexual abuse, was avoiding labels based on fear.

For the first time I watched approximately 40 minutes of Oprah’s new show The Me You Can’t See, last night. Unfortunately, we live in a world in which people project their fears and insecurities on others. I believe many of our adulthood issues stem from our childhood wounds often projected by others. At some point, we believe that others’ opinions mean more than what we think of ourselves. Fortunately, illusions do not stand up to the Truth. The Truth is in us and waiting for us to recognize that we are not what others think of us.

Our parents had reasons for choosing our names, including in memory of a loved one, someone they admired, or the love of a particular name). Who am I to trash over that name? Now, I admit that I am not an expert at remembering names, but I do try. I go further in seeing beyond a person’s name. I see a person who matters and is here for a divine reason.

We are all on a journey of self expression and identification. Especially in childhood we need time to figure ourselves out without the opposition of others. In the same breath, we must know we can’t stop others from talking. As my mother told us, “as long as people have a tongue they will talk.”

Although I learn from my experiences, I am not my experiences. I am not my detours in life, career, profession, or trade. I am not your opinion or stereotype of who I should be. I am not the color of my skin. I am a divine spirit in a unique human form with a mission to complete just like you.

We must know who we are so we do not fall for who we aren’t. You are more than your experiences. You are here for a purpose.

Make this lifetime great!

Timika

I would love for you to be a part of my community bent on healing from the inside out, achieving and sustaining the best health possible, and reuniting with our divine purpose, which is the Light within us.

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