What Did I Learn From My Pain?
Posted on May 27, 2021 Leave a Comment
I knew before age 5 that abusing someone was wrong. I reported to another family member that my father was abusing my mom. I questioned if I was wrong because of the backlash I received from my father. Unfortunately, sprinkles of doubt seeds were instilled into the soil of my inner garden, and I experienced the cycle of pain for the first time.
When I experienced abuse at age 5-10, I struggled with telling the truth, but I learned something about myself before, during, and after my personal experience with abuse.
I realized:
I didn’t want to force anyone to do anything they do not want to do. I carried this principle at the forefront of my mind and heart.
I do not have to be in pain. I wanted to do so much with my life. I wanted to see Saint Louis, Missouri. I craved seeing the rest of God’s world. I wanted to drive and experience real love. I needed to have a normal life. I desired happiness and to do the things I enjoyed. I loved food and the freedom to be who and what I wanted to be. I loved spending time in nature and thinking about life, and sleeping. I loved taking pictures with my camera and with my mind. I loved art and the ability to record life on a piece of paper.
I didn’t like pain. I sought inner guidance to avoid, minimize, and release lingering anger, disappointment, guilt, shame, resentment, and vengeance, for these emotions and feelings were distractions to enjoying life. All of my efforts took time. Still, I didn’t want to miss out on what life had for me. Every moment of feeling in despair reminded me that I didn’t want to feel that way, and I was determined to find my way back to my Truth.
I desired the Truth and to be in alignment with nature. I thought that if there is an all-knowing, ever-present, and loving power in the world, I wanted to have a relationship with it. I listened to and incorporated my mother’s teachings into my life. I read the Bible and learned the Lord’s prayer. I absorbed Jesus’ characteristics and changed to a student approach to life. I observed people and looked for God’s messages in movies, television, and life. I was a learner and not a victim of life, so when things didn’t work out as I wanted, I spent less time beating myself up about my decisions. I learned and moved on, which is what my mother often encouraged us.
Now, at age 46, I understand more about the power of the mind. The brain is small, but a powerful organ, and is our connection to the universal mind. We can choose healing instead of pain.
Refuse to continue pain, and be bent on creating a cycle of Love. And see what doors open up to you. Even if you don’t know what you want, make a list of what you don’t want. Then the want-door opens.
I’m a little bent because of my pain, but I am facing in the right direction.
Make this lifetime great! I believe you can. And, you still have time.
Timika
MSN BSN RN, Integrative Nutrition Health Coach, ACE Fitness Instructor, CDCES
P.S. I would love for you to join my community of being bent on using our experiences as stepping stones to our divine purpose, healing from the inside out, and achieving and sustaining optimal health. Join below.
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These Questions May Help You Change Your State of Mind
Posted on May 26, 2021 Leave a Comment
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How To Keep Fighting and Standing For What You Believe In?
Posted on May 26, 2021 Leave a Comment
One of my pet peeves is someone interfering with the dreams of another. We have the right to keep fighting for our dreams and standing for our beliefs. We have abilities, experiences, gifts, and talents within us that desire expression.
When I was a young girl, I learned about my father’s opposition to my mother’s dream to become a nurse. My mother told us that he always had something else to do instead of babysitting us so our mother could study.
At one point, he threw my mother’s books into the dumpster outside of our Memphis apartment. He even showed up at her job despite the manager’s request, and my mother lost her job.
After experiencing incestual sexual abuse, I was hungry to accomplish something in my life. I needed something to drive me in a different direction. But, I remember not just being angry about my father’s lack of support. I was angry that he felt he had the right to oppose another’s dreams. The same day I heard about my father’s counterattack is the day I said, “he may have stopped you, but he will not stop me.”
In my personal life, I have observed anger, bitterness, and resentment in people who have not accomplished their goals, which makes me more determined to accomplish my dreams and help others do the same.
As a student of life, I knew that information was vital to existence. It’s even more critical to deciphering what you know and need to know.
As a nurse, I continued to help others who felt left out of the information loop in caring for themselves. While working as a hospital educator and a nursing instructor, I built resource guides because I wanted to know as much as possible to help others achieve and sustain health.
I’ve helped people understand how their medications work, take their medications at the right time and right way, lose weight, feel more confident about managing their health, get off their medications, eat healthier, and spend more time doing the things they loved.
My mother taught me to give from the heart, and if we have something to give, give it. Information is not mine to retain. As educators, we want people to think for themselves, but sometimes people need you to make that first step for them. One of the best things I can do to show others I care is by giving them the information they need, including obtaining accurate, reliable, and timely resources.
Just because someone opposes you doesn’t mean you have to give up. I’ll never forget what one of my clients told me. She said, “my doctor told me I couldn’t do it, but I knew I could. And, I did it.” BG.
Whatever you have opposing you, please know there is always a way to get something done.
The first question to ask is……Do you believe you can do it? Then ask, what do you need to know?
Make this lifetime great!
Timika
