What Did I Hear In The Dark?
Posted on June 5, 2021 Leave a Comment
Often, the emotions surrounding our pain cloud Truth’s accessibility. The myths we hold about life and people continue to blurry the lines between illusion and truth. But, no matter what we are going through, Truth is ready and willing to give us a new set of lenses, even after we reject the Truth.
The first time I heard the Voice of Reason was in Memphis, Tennessee. I was under five years old.
Here is an excerpt from Bent Not Broken, my memoir about my healing path after experiencing childhood sexual abuse.
“Besides my brother and me, there were several children in the bedroom my brother, and I shared. I don’t remember how the conversation started, but several kids started teasing me about being afraid of the dark. So, they shoved me in the closet and somehow prevented me from opening the door. The more the kids laughed, the more I pounded on the door and screamed for them to open the door. All I could see was a slither of light between where the two doors met.
Suddenly, I heard this male voice as if it was speaking through me. I stopped pounding and screaming on the door, and I listened. The Voice told me to sit down on the floor, and someone would be in to rescue me. Shortly after sitting crisscrossed on the floor, I heard another voice through the loud commotion. It was my father. I don’t remember what he said to the other children, but he was angry. Then, the door opened.
When the Voice of Reason responded later to my plea for help out of my sexual abuse experience, I responded by saying I didn’t want to get the nicer one of the two, whom I call S, in trouble. The myths I internalized about family, my elders, and S blurred the lines between right and wrong. After the secret was out, I desired to listen and trust the Voice within me.
I believe we all have access to the Voice of Reason, our inner guide to transcend experiences. But, we must be willing to hear and align our will with the Truth.
If you are in an unwanted situation, may I encourage you to take some time now, if you can, or this weekend to unravel some of the beliefs about yourself? Do you believe you have access to the Truth? Do you believe you deserve a life of joy, love, and peace, or do you believe you deserve chaos, pain, and struggles? Which of the above lenses are you using to see yourself, your experiences, and the world?
Sometimes, we need to change the lenses. But first, we need an examination of our belief system and our thoughts. Are your thoughts helping to keep you in your pain cloud or freeing you to enjoy life despite your circumstances?
Much of our resistance comes from fighting our circumstances instead of allowing the Truth to penetrate our being. More than ever I realize that although we cannot change the past, Truth is there to bring peace that surpasses understanding.
Make this lifetime great!
Timika
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Part Of Accepting My Truth Was Shining The Lights On My Myths Part 1.
Posted on June 4, 2021 Leave a Comment
Often, what imprisons us are our beliefs and expectations about people. I knew I had to shine the light on my assumptions to set myself free of anger, disappointment, and magnetizing friends.
Here are five major myths I demystify in Chapter One of my soon-to-be-published memoir, Bent Not Broken.
- Older individuals are wise and always make the right decisions. Truth: Wisdom is a choice, and because someone is older does not mean they always do the right thing.
2. People are less likely to believe you when the person abusing you is liked or popular. Truth: The Truth is the truth, regardless of the person telling it and the one involved.
3. All family members care for you and protect you from harm. Truth: Everyone experiences anger, jealousy, and other emotions and does not always deal with their emotions and feelings in healthy ways. Sometimes pain blinds people from others’ pain.
4. Telling on family members is breaking a family code. Talking back to an adult or talking while an adult talked got you the wrong look or a smack across the face. Truth: We must hold everyone accountable for their actions regardless of family ties, social status, and any other distractions to accountability.
5. People will not like me if I do not comply with their desires. Truth: I am not here to be liked by others. The Truth does not care about clicks.
I didn’t realize my assumptions all at once. As you know, healing is a process, and each day provided me priceless treasures in understanding the weakened areas in my foundation.
What myths about people are you still holding onto? How important is it that you reexamine your beliefs about people and life?
Make this lifetime great!
Timika
MSN BSN RN, Integrative Nutrition Health Coach, ACE Fitness Instructor, CDCES
P.S. I would love for you to join my community of being bent on using our experiences as stepping stones to our divine purpose, healing from the inside out, and achieving and sustaining optimal health. Join below. Also check out this week’s podcast below.
Heal from the Inside Out Series #29: Give from the Heart and Expect Nothing in Return – Create A Generational Love Cycle With Timika S Chambers
- Heal from the Inside Out Series #29: Give from the Heart and Expect Nothing in Return
- The Seeds We Plant Series #60: The Relationship Feedback Loop
- The Seeds We Plant Series: Relationship with Oneself Part 2
- Heal from the Inside Out Series #28: What Does Accepting the Truth After a Painful Experience Mean?
- The Seeds We Plant Series #58: Relationships: Who Do You Think You Are?
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I Didn’t Know
Posted on June 2, 2021 Leave a Comment
As a child, I didn’t know:
- what bullying, manipulation, incestual sexual abuse, and sexual assault meant.
- I needed to heal from childhood sexual abuse.
- Individuals who experienced childhood sexual abuse were at an increased risk of dropping out of high school and experience anxiety, depression, insomnia, teenage pregnancy, and substance abuse.
- Being in an abusive environment increased my risk of being abused.
Therefore, I relied on what I believed, heard, and saw.
I believed:
- I was here for a purpose.
- True Love is possible.
- Life had more to show me.
- I am a student of life.
I heard:
- The Voice of reason within me. I had a connection to something greater than me, and I needed to listen.
- My mother’s life principles including giving from the heart, living another day, cleaning your heart, taking care of what you have so God could bless you with more, listening, and how you do not need to create the past.
- Positive reinforcement from my mother, brothers, other family members, friends, and teachers
I saw:
- The two family members and many others get on with their lives, so I chose to get on with mine.
- Beautiful, poised, strong trees endure extreme temperatures, and each year, they looked better than the last one.
- Character traits I wanted and did not want in movies and television shows.
In my case, what I didn’t know, helped me. I dug deep within and called out for nature’s help. I do not minimize any experience anyone goes through. I know how important it is to understand how something affected us, but, I know our beliefs and what we hear and see impact our healing path from traumatic experiences.
Research and statistics have their place, but you do not have to put limits on how you should feel, respond, and think about your life experiences.
Make this lifetime great!
You deserve it!
Timika
MSN BSN RN, Integrative Nutrition Health Coach, ACE Fitness Instructor, CDCES
P.S. I would love for you to join my community of being bent on using our experiences as stepping stones to our divine purpose, healing from the inside out, and achieving and sustaining optimal health. Join below.
Timika S Chambers 