How To Walk Instead of Jumping The Expectation Hurdles

Photo by Andrea Piacquadio on Pexels.com

Often mother would say, “as long as people have a tongue, they will talk. Pay attention to their actions.” My mother was not telling us not to trust people but to leave some space between expectations and realizations. The Webster dictionary defines expect as 1. to consider probable or certain. 2. to consider reasonable due or necessary 3. to consider bound in duty or obligated. 4. to anticipate or look forward to the coming or occurrence. Other definitions include await, look forward, suppose, stay, or think, or wait (https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/expect). When I read the above definitions, I thought no wonder expectations could negatively affect us. We bound and wait for someone to do their duty. No wonder many of us put up with certain behaviors. We wait and hope the other person change without doing anything on our part.

Often, we put up with how others treat us and hope for the best. We hope someday soon they see the Light. But, the days, months, and years continue to be the same. We make excuses for people. They are stressed, unhappy, in pain, or others, and we end up stressed, unhappy, in pain, resentful, and others. We may even blame ourselves for what someone else does. How does that last sentence sound to you? We blame ourselves for what we cannot control in the first place.

Between the ages of 5–10, I waited for the two family members who misused my body, and I waited for them to do the right thing. What I learned was I had to speak up for myself to change my situation. I couldn’t wait on the two family members to decide my fate any longer. And, I continued to use my voice and legs to change and free myself from situations that did not benefit me. 

I didn’t want to keep jumping the hurdles. Instead, I exited the experience and kept walking.

As you know actions speak louder than words, and when people keep showing you they are not on the same level, it’s time to change. And I believe we don’t have to hurt others to make our requests known.

  1. Please pay attention to the actions of a person and their words. Do their actions and words match?
  2. Use your voice to tell someone how you feel and let others know about it. Keep speaking until someone believes you and helps you do something about the situation, especially if you are in an abusive situation.
  3. Remind people of your shared goal. Sometimes we get off track (personal, family, and other situations), and a friendly reminder is all we need.
  4. Make sure your actions and words match (living with integrity). I believe we do attract who we are. When we think less of ourselves, someone or something may try to prove our low sense of self-worth.

You deserve joy and peace. You are more than your experiences.

Make this lifetime great!

Timika

MSN BSN RN, Integrative Nutrition Health Coach, ACE Fitness Instructor, CDCES

P.S. I would love for you to join my community of being bent on using our experiences as stepping stones to our divine purpose, healing from the inside out, and achieving and sustaining optimal health. Subscribe to @timikaschambers.com by clicking the link below.

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A Sunday Refresh

Hi there!
I hope you are refueling yourself with some relaxation! When you reflect on the past, do you see your strengths or weaknesses? Do you see pain or even little moments of happiness?
Somewhere in you is the joy, peace, and love that transcends your experiences.


Are you looking for yourself today? Are you reuniting with your inner child who has dreams and hopes for a better life? Are you letting your past and current circumstances kill your convictions and inspirations or shut down the whisper that says “you are worthy of your dreams?”

You deserve joy, love, and to fulfill your purpose. You decide who and what you want from your experiences.

Take time to remember the child within and a moment to separate yourself from your experiences.

Make this lifetime great! Today, remember who you are.

Timika Chambers

MSN BSN RN, Integrative Nutrition Health Coach, ACE Fitness Instructor, CDCES

P.S. I would love for you to join my community of being bent on using our experiences as stepping stones to our divine purpose, healing from the inside out, and achieving and sustaining optimal health. Subscribe to @timikaschambers.com by clicking the link below.

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How To Heal From Childhood Sexual Abuse. Step One is to Acknowledge All of Your Truths

I refuse to be a victim. I am a student of life.

I believe all of us are students and teachers of life. Every experience provides us information about ourselves, including our views on life.

At 5 years old, two family members misused my developing body. I knew it wasn’t my fault they abused me, for no child is the cause of an adult’s behavior. But, I still experienced anger, guilt, shame, resentment, and vengeance. Then, I realized that the above emotions were distractions to me moving forward with my life, which is my divine right to enjoy.

The two family members were my first teachers. I didn’t deny what happened, for every cell of my body knew what happened. I learned who I didn’t want to be, and therefore, who I wanted to be.

I have some questions for you. Are you still angry at your teachers? Are you suffering from something they did to you such as lack of restful sleep, balanced and proper nutrition, peace of mind, and living your divine purpose? What that person or persons did may not have been right, but do you deserve to be imprisoned by anger, anxiety, resentment, shame, and other life-draining emotions and feelings?

I believe that many of our physical symptoms stem from unhealed pain. Many people suffer from this cycle of pain (chronic and rare health conditions), but you don’t have to. In other words, someone acted from their pain when they hurt you, but you don’t have to carry their baggage.

As you know, the truth is not always easy to accept, but the truth is essential to our healing. I could not take back my childhood experience with sexual abuse, but I could incorporate the lessons I learned from it. One thing I learned is who I didn’t want to be.

The theme for this week and June will be on how to acknowledge the truth after childhood sexual abuse. Once we accept the truth, we open the door to our individualized healing path. We realize that we no longer need to suffer, and it is our right to learn from our experiences, live our divine purpose, and love ourselves and others.

Make this lifetime great! This is your life, and you deserve all the good things in store for you.

To Your Best Health!

Timika