Second Thoughts led me back to my first thought

Second Thoughts

How many times have you ever thought about which action to take the next day…you know….. how you wanted the next day to go, and when that day came, you had second thoughts and decided to do something else? Were you able to come back to your senses before it was too late and followed your first thought or plan of action?
Today went so much smoother because I decided against rushing to go to events. I picked one event to go to and took my time to get there. I spent a bit more time with TLC for me today instead of trying to get several activities done in a small window of time.

I am so glad I decided to clear my mind and think about what would be the best plan of action. My day went a lot smoother, and it was a true win-win for all. I kept my word to do something, my children learned some new information, and I learned about a new educational program geared towards helping children succeed in school. If I had chosen a different scenario, we may have missed the event and the information shared.

Some things I try to remember when making decisions are:

1. Mood-What mood am I in while trying to decide? I was acting like my old self trying to get so much done in a small window of time.
2. Information-How well informed am I about your choices? Do I have enought time to complete the activity?
3. Intention-Why do I want to do what I want to do? I have to remind myself that it is not about the number of activities I can complete; it’s about the quality of the experience. What promises have a I made to myself or others>
4. Resources-What resources do I have or need to help me make my decision.
5. End result- Am I aiming for a Win-win? Who will benefit from my decision/actions?

Having second thoughts led me back to my original thought.



Image result for intuition

What’s irksome for me is when I do not listen to my gut/intuition.  I am learning more and more each day that even when I do not understand the reasons beyond a thought or a gut reaction; it is okay. I do not have to see the future before I decide to take action; it is important to have faith and trust that things will work out.  Usually, the answer as to why I should do something, will come within a few minutes, hours, days, or even in some cases, years later.  It feels good when I do follow my gut to leave and go to the store now, to call a friend or my mom now, to send a text now, or visit someone now, because usually when I do, I tend to have a more desirable outcome, than if I did not follow my gut/intuition.  I have had many instances, over the years, when I felt like I should have said or done something and did not.

It is not so much about regretting not saying or doing something I felt I should have.  It is about trusting myself.  It is about trusting yourself. We need to trust the guide inside and be able to let go of needing to control everything in our life and let go….

Image result for intuitionWhen you feel the need to encourage a loved one to check his or her blood pressure, blood sugar, to go and check on your children, to take your son or daughter to the doctor, to sign up for a class, to start your own business, to go on vacation, to take care of yourself, to patiently wait for the train to pass (I’ve seen the results of individuals wanting to beat trains), to ask the pharmacist why this month’s pills are different from last month, to remind the doctor that it is your left leg that is bothering you instead of your right, to ask your doctor for a generic form of the drug he or she is prescribing you, to leave the house later than usual, to end a relationship with someone, to go back and check to see if you locked the door, to go back and check to see if you turned off the stove, to say no to someone, to wear certain clothes instead of the one you picked out, waiting until morning to take the trash out………and more.

Follow your gut/intuition.  Most likely, you will be glad you did.


Base on which ye stands


Our beliefs about ourselves, the world, and others will show in our action toward ourselves and others. A foundation may look strong until it is shaken up a bit by life circumstances. Is your foundation or the base of you, built on truth, integrity, honor, love, compassion, empathy, honest communication, and other positive virtues, or on superiority/inferiority, anger, frustration, bitterness, and/or hate?

Do you immediately forgive yourself when you do not accomplish your goals for the day? Do you continuously blame yourself or berate others when things do not go your way? Do you congratulate yourself for trying a new skill even if you were not as successful as you wanted to be at the skill? Or do you feel that you are incompetent when something does not turn out the way the picture in the magazine looked? Better yet, do you hold a grudge when someone does not do what they said they were going to do? Or, do you immediately forgive that person and ask what could you have done to help? Or do you just assume that, that person did not want to help anyway? Do we feel that it is important to communicate our feelings to our friends/love ones, or do we feel that they will not understand, and it is not worth sharing our feelings? Do we feel that others, especially our loved ones, are capable of empathizing with us? Are we quick to judge others? If yes, then more than likely we are quick to judge ourselves.

If we are quick to show compassion to ourselves when we do not achieve the goals we set forth for the day, then we are more likely to show compassion to others when they do not achieve their goals. Your internal dialogue will sometimes be the same conversation you have with others (mostly negative or mostly positive). It’s hard to be positive toward others if you are negative towards yourself, and vice versa.

If you motivate yourself when you are working on a project, then you are probably more likely to try to motivate others. If you feel that your emotions/feelings are of value, then you are more likely to share those emotions/feelings with your loved ones. They are your loved ones, right? Do we see people as capable of achieving their goals, or do we feel that we should always do things for them for the task to come out, right? Do we enable others to think for themselves and care for themselves, or do we enable them to depend on us for everything, and then we get mad and feel like “he can’t do anything himself?”

Does everyone have the basic right to live here on earth? Does everyone regardless of race, culture, religion, gender, (and anything else used to separate humanity) deserve the to be treated the same way? If you are hard on yourself and set expectations so high that when you do not achieve your goals, you may end of feeling anxious, depressed, moody, withdrawing from others, you are probably hard on others or will be most of the time. You will tend to have unrealistic expectations for others, and many times you will end up disappointed.

If you are dissatisfied with how you treat others, look at your foundation. How sturdy is your base? Here you will find the root of your behaviors. How you treat others may reflect how you feel about yourself.