Martyr: It’s your call


If we find ourselves seeking attention through pain and suffering, then let’s dig deep inside to the root of our behavior.  Being a maryr, in a sense of exaggerating your suffering, may not bring you the positive reactions you seek.

I believe that unless someone proves you wrong, believe what he or she says.  This principle was also reinforced in nursing school. Therefore, if someone says that he or she hurts or is in pain, then I  believe him or her.  I do try to know as much as I can about the condition and understand the physiological and psychological aspects of that condition, so I can fully understand what is going on and help guide the individual to accurate and timely care.

There may times that we may use our illness or condition to elicit compassion, attention, gifts/desired action of others, and other reactions.  Even children will do things to elicit attention at times, especially when they are not receiving the attention they want, whether it is to have a parent put a band aid on a small cut or bruise or to get a hug or kiss from a parent.  Up until a certain age, individuals are limited in their expressions.  As adults, though, as long as we are mentally and physically capable, we should express our emotions and feelings to others.

We should not feel like we need to harm ourselves just to receive attention from others or feel like we need to make something more than it is.  If we know how to take care of ourselves, then we should do so.  There are healthy ways of communicating with others.

If there is something that is bothering you, then please take the time to discuss your concerns with loved ones.  If you feel that you need professional help, then seek it. Continue to take care of yourself.  You should never have to endanger your life to receive attention from others.  If someone is not giving you the attention you feel you deserve, communicate to him or her in a healthy and timely fashion.





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