The Seeds We Plant Series #35: Relationships and Self-Worth
Hi there!
I hope all is well with you and yours!
Our external environment impacts our internal foundation. Relationships such as marriages, intimate relationships, friendships, coaches and teams, school administrators, teachers, and students, employers and employees, mentors and mentees, and others) are opportunities to demonstrate our truths. Through our relationships, we find out if we have veered from the core of who we are.
Sometimes, people who hurt, whether consciously or unconsciously, hurt others through actions, inactions, and words. Doubting ourselves and wondering if we did something to cause someone to project their pain on us can lead us down a dark tunnel of low self-worth. We may live in secret for years, hoping people will change. Yet, all along, our health suffers emotionally, mentally, physically, socially, spiritually, and in every other way.
Projected pain comes in many forms, including but not limited to hitting, kicking, pushing, degrading and manipulating people through words. Sometimes, people feel entitled to treat us a certain way based on their position, title, social class, etc. They might rationalize their behaviors as “I’m only doing this because I love you,” “I wouldn’t have to do this if you respected yourself more,” or “I went through it, so you have to, as well.” We may keep people in unhealthy relationships because we normalize it instead of the Truth inside us.
An unhealthy relationship doesn’t have to end immediately. Through modeling, we can show others how we want to be treated. It’s easy to turn against yourself, but remember, every experience, including our relationship with ourselves and others, is an opportunity to reflect the Truth in you, bringing you closer to your higher self and your Creator.
It’s important to align yourself with your Truth (what you believe in your heart) and stand on that foundation. When you respect yourself, you increase the chances of others respecting you. Through embracing, nourishing, and expressing your light, someone remembers theirs, and then we have a domino effect of light instead of darkness. People heal instead of continuing the same cycle of pain.
My mother is the one who taught me that when people don’t change, you change. She left years of abuse to give her children and herself a better life. Through my actions as a parent, my children recognize unhealthy behavior. It is so important that they don’t start blaming themselves for another’s actions or think they deserve abuse. In other words, as parents, we help set the foundation and standards of self-worth. But to set the foundation, we must address ours first.
Self-worth is not arrogance but an awareness of the spiritual beings that all of us are. When you have healthy self-worth, it doesn’t take long to realize when someone has violated you and yourself. (What they do to you, they first do to themselves.) You know something needs to change.
Truth knows who you are and encourages you to align with it through actions and words. Your internal gauge will let you know when something isn’t right. The more we listen to our intuitive muscle, the stronger it becomes, and so do we.
Ultimately, we teach others how to treat us through actions and words. We must speak up for ourselves when others violate our boundaries. Secrets grow out of guilt, shame, and diminished self-worth.
We solidify our foundation with truths. When we allow others to demoralize or demean us in any way, we weaken our foundation and the ability to see our life’s meaning and purpose.
It’s critical that we:
- Assess our beliefs about ourselves and the role of experiences in our lives. We examine our definitions of friendships, marriages, parent-child relationships, employer-employee relationships, and others.
- Assess our relationships and what we allow people to do. How do you feel about your current relationships? How do you feel after being around them and talking to them?
- Model healthy self-worth to our children through actions and words.
- Nip unhealthy behavior in the bud as much as possible. We speak up when we feel compelled to do so or follow the actions of our higher selves.
Listen to The Seeds We Plant Series #34: Relationship and Self-Worth on Create a Generational Love Cycle, and let me know your thoughts. How are you using friendship to cultivate self-worth?
In addition, here is the link to sign up for my newsletter, Notes on Life: Empowering You to Be You!
https://mailchi.mp/fe2da5c9163a/seven-spiritual-truths
By remembering who we are, we create a generational love cycle, heal from the inside out, achieve and sustain optimal health, and fulfill our divine purpose.
Heal from the Inside Out Series #37: Don't Let Someone Else Tell You to Do the Right Thing – Create A Generational Love Cycle With Timika S Chambers
- Heal from the Inside Out Series #37: Don't Let Someone Else Tell You to Do the Right Thing
- The Seeds We Plant Series #68: Self-Hatred
- Heal from the Inside Out Series #36: My mama told me, "What is for Me, I Will Get & I Believed Her."
- The Seeds We Plant Series #67: Divisiveness + My Poem "A Testament to the Truth."
- Heal from the Inside Out series #35: The Power of Thought. Just Because Someone Else Experienced it Does not Mean You Have to.
Timika S Chambers
Remember Who You Aretimikaschambers.com
As always, make this lifetime great because you still can!
Timika
